Celebrating mothers

Two parents. Four hands. Zero rest.

A set of adorable, albeit shrieking, babies.

Two car seats. Double strollers. Two high chairs. Double the day care costs. Twice as many diapers and wipes. Two meltdowns.

Twice as many joyful moments. Double the hugs. Love, multiplied.

With parenthood and its ensuing exhaustion, sleep and quality time with family are the two things most moms tell the Sun they’d like this weekend.

Here, to help celebrate Mother’s Day, we share tales of three mothers with twins.

***

Six weeks is all Valerie Nurse had to prepare for motherhood.

Nurse and husband Scott wanted a newborn and opted for an open, private adoption.

After a detailed, “invasive” application process, they met a woman carrying twins.

A short time later, the phone rang; chosen couple, they were.

With the birth mother’s contact information in hand, “I felt like a little kid, like, calling her first boy. I had all my questions written down,” said Nurse, who works in public health.

Fast forward six weeks.

Two baby girls were born.

The couple named the twins Laura and Elizabeth, meeting them in hospital when they were 24 hours old.

Four days later, they took their daughters home to greet family and friends.

The entire process “was like a miracle because it was literally the length of a pregnancy,” said Nurse, from Embrun.

The Nurses often deal with questions about much they paid for their children, or what about their ‘real’ mother?

“You learn to take it that people aren’t educated,” she said.

Nurse was schooled in fertility when she was just 14.

A doctor told Nurse she had premature ovarian failure and couldn’t bear children.

The girls turn two in August.

“I never dreamt of this,” she said, crying, “and at 14, you’re too young to realize what being a mom is.”

Nurse’s own mother recently revealed the day they found out about the infertility, “she went to her sister’s house and just cried. And she shared that with me after the fact that I was a mom … ’cause she never wanted me to feel her pain,” said Nurse.

“That’s what moms are there for: To protect you. But I now have the joy of being a mom as well.”

***

Ambereen Rahim was once apprehensive about motherhood.

So much so that “I would never hold other babies because I was afraid of dropping them,” Rahim said.

Now she’s regularly dropping knowledge on other parents.

“Having one baby changes your life. Having two turns your life upside down,” said Rahim, of Gloucester.

“You have to be on top of things all the time.”

Two-year-old twins Saniya and Faizan have morphed this petite federal public servant into a productivity machine.

Parenthood forces you to be organized, efficient, and willing to accept help, she said.

With husband Intiaz, they’ve been tag-teaming the twins when it comes to their morning routine, bed time, and meals.

“We pre-cook batches of stuff and we freeze it,” Rahim said.

“It’s funny, I don’t know how to relax anymore.”

Cooking, blogging, tackling laundry, and otherwise managing the household takes place after they put the kids to bed.

“When you do all that, there’s very little time as a couple,” she said.

Romance can entail sitting outside on the porch.

Thanks to family members willing to babysit, they still squeak out ‘date night.’

“We have to make sure we don’t tire ourselves out,” said Rahim.

En route to the theatre once, she recalls, they considered blowing off the flick to sleep in the car.

The movie won out.

Nonetheless, “I feel really proud to say I have kids, I have twins,” she said.

Rahim plans to book a few vacation days this summer, pull her children out of daycare, and just hang out.

She’s not one of those moms craving ‘alone time’ so naturally, for Mother’s Day, “I want an outing with the kids,” she said.

***

Cori Pinault has always had a penchant for learning about living things, so no one was surprised when she pursued a career in science.

Producing living things, though, was never in her plan.

“I just couldn’t picture myself as a mom,” said Pinault, a biology and chemistry teacher who heads the science department at St. Joseph High School in Barrhaven.

Then she met Darren Hill on a blind date set up through friends.

Over time, “I loved him so much,” said Pinault, chuckling, she realized she wanted to have his children.

Such sappiness was alarming.

“I’m not corny. I’m a scientist; very organized and linear,” she said.

Mitchell and Cassie, now five, were born two months premature.

Last year, Mitchell was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome, a form of autism, while Cassie struggles with controlling her temper.

Despite the challenges, “there’s no better feeling than small arms around your neck, a tiny hand in yours, caressing baby soft cheeks, and the excitement you are greeted with when you pick them up after work,” said Pinault.

“I’m immensely proud of each milestone they reach, regardless of how small.”

For Mother’s Day, “I really want the handmade cars from the kids … that would be really cute,” she said.

Other than that, there isn’t much Pinault covets.

“We’re fortunate enough that we have everything we need.”

Twitter: @ottawasunkroche

http://www.ottawasun.com/2013/05/12/celebrating-mothers

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